How do you spell...?

You now how when you speak slang people pretty much know what you mean? But when you type it, it can look totally wrong... and like you're remedial? I was tyring to type the shortened slang of usual as "use," but that just spells USE and doesn't sound like "use." How do you spell "use?"!!! Here are some of my attempts:

Ush
Us
Use
Ushe
Usze
Yoosh
Yoozsh

Sigh of relief!!

Well, I'm glad THAT'S over!! phew! So I just sang in church a few hours ago and I went through just about every emotion possible, it was like a roller coaster ride. I think people must have heard me differently than I sounded to myself, because I got a lot of compliments. Not that I think I did bad, I actually think I did better than I thought I would, but because I'm a perfectionist, I wish I had done even better. Overall though, I'm pretty happy. I did something that was really hard for me, totally out of my comfort zone, and I didn't suck royally. If I'm going to be totally honest, for as little experience I have singing solo's, I actually think I did pretty good. I have to say, overall again, that I am happy with how it turned out... but I AM glad it's over!!

Would I do it again...? Maybe... :)

The oxymoron that is "Country Music"

So here's some background: I don't like country music. Please read on.

My co-worker's know this about me. Still they try to "convert" me. The last I knew Country Music is a style of music, not a religion. Anyway, so one of my co-workers (don't worry Maili I won't tell anyone it was you!) allowed a country song to play in my presence. When I asked my usual question, "Is this country?" (knowing full well that it is and that it should be stopped), she replied, somewhat energetically, that it was, but that I HAD to listen to it because it was so good! Fast Forward to a few minutes (or is it hours) later when I pick up on the chorus about someone who is in obvious pain and has decided that we all need to hear about it. I offered the following insight to my co-worker (who shall Maili go un-named), "Maybe she's hurting so much because someone is forcing her to listen to Country Music." To which, my co-worker replies, "No, it's about how her husband died, and that's why she's sad." (As if that's supposed to make it okay.) I said, "Wow, a country song that's also depressing - that's a new combination!" To which my co-worker responded (swiping at me in the air in frustration), "It's sad - it's good."

Could that be a new advertising campaign? Country Music - so sad, it's good!

So sad - it’s good… hmmm… I’m still working that one out... I agree with the first part of that phrase anyway...

Fitting in...

So on my drive into work this morning I passed a guy that was jogging and I thought, "I am not a jogger, but I bet that would be fun." That got me started thinking about where I fit in. I’ve been fighting negative labels my entire life. I’ve often expressed to people that I grew up in a world where I didn’t fit in. When I say “fit in” I mean that literally. I didn’t fit into the desks at school, I didn’t fit into the clothes other kids my age were wearing, I couldn’t go to friends party’s because there wasn’t room in the car, etc. It’s taken me quite a long time to remove all the negative labels I was both given and took on. But I was thinking, that while some labels are bad, some are good. Labels like, Humble, Faithful, Obedient, Kind, etc. I guess those are also more like traits, but you get my drift. I was also thinking in terms of hobby’s and occupations by which people label themselves, like jogging. Or for example, someone say’s, “I’m a doctor.” That’s a label, as well as an occupation and it’s how that person defines themselves. I don’t really have that. I work in HR. I don’t think that defines me, especially since I am wanting to change careers. So I don’t feel like I fit-in in HR. Where do I fit in? I’m not a doctor, lawyer, artist, musician, athlete, mechanic, golfer, skydiver, accountant, manager, farmer, etc.

I guess what I’m really saying, is I don’t know which label to choose for myself. I am finally at a place in my life where I realize that I choose what defines me. I just haven’t learned yet, what that should be. What is it I really want to be? I don’t know. I guess I’ve been living so long trying to get away from bad labels that I never learned how to gain good labels… Where do I fit in?

My second question is, isn't a little bit early to be thinking about this kind of stuff?

Speech and Singing

So it’s been a while since I last updated this, but at least it hasn’t been six months!! My fans have been asking, and I hate to disappoint. (p.s. I could pay my fans five dollars each and only be out five bucks!!) :) Anyway, here’s what’s going on with me…

I have decided that I want to pursue a career in Speech-Language Pathology (SLP). This is totally unrelated to my current job in HR, but I think this is the right direction for me. I have not been as happy in HR overall as I hoped to be. While Intermountain Healthcare is a great place to work, I’ve realized that I don’t want to move up in HR in general. I should add, that I’ve suspected this was the case for some time, but since I didn’t have any other direction and/or options I just stayed with HR. My mom was telling me about someone she knows who does Speech Therapy and she said that I might be good at it. As I looked into it initially, I became excited and realized that this is a great direction for me to go. I’ve been feeling stuck because I want a career, not just a job and I don’t feel I want to make HR my career. Too much politics, and bureaucracy, and not enough helping people. What appeals most to me about SLP is the one-on-one interaction and meeting diverse people. So I’ve enrolled in a GRE Prep course for the Spring and I’ll apply for Graduate School as soon as my scores are available. I am hoping to get in at the U, but I’ll probably apply to BYU as well, just in case. I am so excited to start that it’s hard for me to stay motivated at my current job. But I will definitely need to work while I go through school so I need to just buckle down and stick with it. Which I can do.

So, I did a dumb thing. I volunteered to help our ward choir director with the Christmas Program. I’m pretty sure I said I could help with a quartet/duet… yeah…. Now I’m singing a solo. I haven’t ever sung a flat out solo. I think the last time I was close was in Elementary when I sang one verse of Whitney Houston’s “One Moment in Time.” I sucked. David Price and Raimey Westwood were awesome (they sang the other two verses)! I learned my lesson and decided to stick with “choir” singing… where no one could actually hear me. So now I am in a quandary. I thought about it and decided I would go through with it. No matter what happens at least I’ll know that I did something to get out of my comfort zone and try something new. I am scared… nay, terrified even, but feel like whatever talent I may have, I should at least attempt to develop… so here goes! I’ll be singing “Once in Royal David’s City” this Sunday as part of the Christmas program. PRAY FOR ME!!!!