Monday, November 29, 2010

I'm still here...

I am torn between loving and hating not having an internet connection at home. I love it because it means I have money for food and I hate it because, let's face it, I'm a big fan of instant gratification. I hate that I can't see what time a movie is playing, but then I remember that I don't have money for that kind of thing and then I'm grateful I don't have to be tempted to buy tickets because I don't have the internet. I hate that I can't watch my favorite shows/movies online anymore. I have to "borrow" them when I am at the library or anywhere else I can get a free connection. Then I remember that school is my first priority and I don't really have time to watch tv anyway, so I am grateful I don't have the internet at home. You see what I mean?

The other downside is that I don't get to blog as much either and that is sad for me. It's proven to be a good outlet for me so I miss being able to do it whenever I can get a second to organize my thoughts.

Just know that I am still here. School is going really, really well, although it is overwhelming and stressful at times. Work is okay, I struggle with my midget paycheck, but I am grateful to have a job and a paycheck at all. I have not yet learned how to be patient.I am still trying to practice lessons the Lord has helped me to learn. I still have moments of doubt that I'm doing the right thing or that I am up to the task ahead of me. Can I really learn what I need to learn to be successful in the career I've chosen? I'm still trying to accept that some dreams have to take a back seat and that the sacrifices I'm making now will be worth it and will set a foundation for a better life.

Overall, I'm happy. I am learning to take the good with the bad and now I'm trying to ignore the "Facts of Life" theme song that just popped into my head....

I hope to blog about my Thanksgiving, which was both the best and the not so best I've ever had. I think the appropriate term is bitter sweet. But that will have to wait another day. I have a report to write and procrastinating isn't making it any easier!!