I didn't think I'd make it past the first week and here I am! We're already talking "midterms." I can't say that I've found my groove yet though. That will take some more time. I am at least starting to feel like I'm not going to totally burn out, so for me, that is progress. One of the hardest things I am trying to adjust to is a lack of structure. I mean, there are things I know I need to do, but the order that I get them done is totally up to me and that's unusual. I'm coming from HR where there is (usually) much more structure and I can feel my brain protesting at this new style of schedule. That and the amount of information being thrown at us each day is just overwhelming!
But as I was driving home today, I put on some good music and I was thinking about everything going on and I felt happy. I didn't necessarily feel peaceful or anything, but I was able to recognize on some level that I am happy where I am. Busy, yes. Trying, yes. Struggling, yes. Hard, yes. But I'm hanging in there and that makes me feel good. I think part of the reason I'm happy is because I am being challanged in such a new way and even though it's hard, its being hard doesn't detract from the fact that I love what I'm learning and I'm looking foward to all of the things I'll be able to do and all of the people I'll be able to help. That makes me hopeful and I feel like this time of great struggle is worthwhile.
That and I just finished reading Moby Dick, which I really, really enjoyed! Back to homework...
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Catching up...
...Or trying to anyway. When life changes, it changes SOOOO fast! I am feeling really overwhelmed at the moment. Graduate school is proving to be more of an adjustment than I thought. It's just flat out hard! (There is SO much to read!) I guess I knew it would be hard, but I really couldn't appreciate just how hard it was until I started. Now I can see why people kept saying, don't have another job, don't get married, have a kid, or buy a house, in other words, don't have a life for two years. They really mean it!!
I know I'll get through it, though. I know I will adjust, it's just that it's taking much more time than I thought it would. It's really making me question what I think I'm capable of and what I think I deserve (I really hate that word "deserve"). It might actually be more accurate to say, what I'm worth. Which is really a good thing. I'm glad that I'm in a place in life where I can be asking these questions of myself. I think that, in and of itself, is a sign of growth.
I am sad that I had to quit my job this week. I will miss the people I work(ed) with. They were (are) so much fun! But, with the school workload being what it is (and being offered a position to work in the department, which is a huge honor) I know it was the right thing to do. I am so excited to be working for my professors, getting to know them on a more personal level will be a great experience for me. I will really benefit as a clinician from my experience working for them. (I start working for them next week!)
I have also received my apprenticeship assignment at the Clinic and I am way excited about it. So as some background, even in our first semester, we are assigned to a mentor who is working with a specific client, and potentially, by the end of the semester we may even get to conduct a session or two with the client (with our mentor present, obviously!). Then, our second semester we are assigned our very own client! So they kind of just throw us in the fire from the very beginning. It's terrifying and exciting all at the same time. In any case, I did some clinical observation hours over the summer and I saw a few clients in particular. Well, as luck would have it, the client I've been assigned to just happens to be one of the people I had observed most! I feel really fortunate to get to work with somone I "already know," and it feels even more serendipitous knowing that the assignments were all random! Yet another reason to feel like I'm in the right place.
Even though I go home some nights wondering how I'm going to get through it, I know I'm in the right place. I know that everything will work out because it already is working out. I love what I'm learning and I know that when I get through it, my life will be so much better because I'll be doing something I love and can be passionate about.
I know I'll get through it, though. I know I will adjust, it's just that it's taking much more time than I thought it would. It's really making me question what I think I'm capable of and what I think I deserve (I really hate that word "deserve"). It might actually be more accurate to say, what I'm worth. Which is really a good thing. I'm glad that I'm in a place in life where I can be asking these questions of myself. I think that, in and of itself, is a sign of growth.
I am sad that I had to quit my job this week. I will miss the people I work(ed) with. They were (are) so much fun! But, with the school workload being what it is (and being offered a position to work in the department, which is a huge honor) I know it was the right thing to do. I am so excited to be working for my professors, getting to know them on a more personal level will be a great experience for me. I will really benefit as a clinician from my experience working for them. (I start working for them next week!)
I have also received my apprenticeship assignment at the Clinic and I am way excited about it. So as some background, even in our first semester, we are assigned to a mentor who is working with a specific client, and potentially, by the end of the semester we may even get to conduct a session or two with the client (with our mentor present, obviously!). Then, our second semester we are assigned our very own client! So they kind of just throw us in the fire from the very beginning. It's terrifying and exciting all at the same time. In any case, I did some clinical observation hours over the summer and I saw a few clients in particular. Well, as luck would have it, the client I've been assigned to just happens to be one of the people I had observed most! I feel really fortunate to get to work with somone I "already know," and it feels even more serendipitous knowing that the assignments were all random! Yet another reason to feel like I'm in the right place.
Even though I go home some nights wondering how I'm going to get through it, I know I'm in the right place. I know that everything will work out because it already is working out. I love what I'm learning and I know that when I get through it, my life will be so much better because I'll be doing something I love and can be passionate about.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Woohoo!
After a few disappointing grades on a couple of assignments and doing really bad on the final I finally got my grade and guess what? I got an A!!! True, it's the very lowest percentage possible (93%), but hey, an A's an A, right? I'm glad it's done and I hope I never have to take an online class again - not my favorite format!!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Branding
I think I've bogged about this before, but I need a brand. (okay, I don't NEED a brand, but I want one) I want something that represents me. You know how, like, some people's email are surfergirl5, or cycleordeath, or whatever? They have a brand - something that they can say "this is who I am" or "this defines me." I don't have that. I don't really have a trait or hobby or skill that really defines me. Why is that? I wonder if Speech Therapy will be "my thing?" I guess now I just need to figure out how to make Speech Therapy into a logo to complete my brand...
I also want a theme song. I would play the song when I'm in a good mood, just boppin' down the street.
Hm... now I'm wondering if maybe I've seen too many movies...
I also want a theme song. I would play the song when I'm in a good mood, just boppin' down the street.
Hm... now I'm wondering if maybe I've seen too many movies...
Monday, July 25, 2011
Lame
So the whole reason I bought my phone was for its hotspot capabilities, however I just received a notice that now, if I want to use the hotspot, I have to pay another 30 bucks a month! Yeah, that's so not going to happen! Now I know how the netflix customer's feel! At least my phone does pretty well with most websites, but not all websites are "mobile compatible." Lame.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Spaghetti squash
At the moment I am eating Spaghetti Squash for lunch. There are a couple of ways I like it. The first, the "noodles" lightly seasoned with salt, pepper and butter - yum!! But since I am not eating dairy and butter is out, I am having them the second way I like them, a la spaghetti sauce, homemade, of course!. (The sauce is tomato, mushrooms, onion, garlic, ground turkey, and my own special blend of seasonings!) No, the squash does NOT taste like actual spaghetti does, but that being the case, it's still pretty good. Also, it's just a great alternative to regular pasta and much, much healthier.
Incidentally, I love Everyday Foods! I used to watch this program on Saturday mornings - I don't even know if it's still on or not - and I was shocked to find out it was produced by Martha Stewart. Normally, I'm not much of a Martha Stewart fan, but I really liked this show. The recipes were fairly straightforward and "doable."I think they even have a litte magazine they put out. In any event, this was the first time I had ever seen a spaghetti squash, let alone how to bake it. It makes me wonder what other foods are out there that are rarely used?
Incidentally, I love Everyday Foods! I used to watch this program on Saturday mornings - I don't even know if it's still on or not - and I was shocked to find out it was produced by Martha Stewart. Normally, I'm not much of a Martha Stewart fan, but I really liked this show. The recipes were fairly straightforward and "doable."I think they even have a litte magazine they put out. In any event, this was the first time I had ever seen a spaghetti squash, let alone how to bake it. It makes me wonder what other foods are out there that are rarely used?
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
The Fall of Micah
First off, just let me say, I wish I had more interesting things to blog about. I always find myself fascinated by other blogger's posts and wonder how they can find such interesting things to say. Then I realized - they are pretty much blogging about their average day, but because it's not my life, it sounds interesting. Maybe I'll try to add more posts about mundane things and see what happens.
I'll spare you the background story and get right to the point of my next thought. (My sister's will tell you - I'm a horrible storyteller, so I'm doing you a favor! You're welcome! *SNAP*) This is the Fall of Micah. So you know how some people say's it's "their year?" Great things are about to happen; they can feel it coming. As if a distant train, bearing a cornucopia of blessings, is speeding toward them with nothing but a faint rumbling in the ground to announce it's approach. For some people, the train has more of a timetable and it's not just their year, but their season, for example, "this is going to be the Summer of Carl," or whatever. Well, that's how I feel with Grad School starting this Fall. It's the Fall of Micah. I feel like great things are going to happen. There's an anticipation I can't describe or even attach to any specific future event - I just think life is going to be great! (Someone suggested to me the Autumn of Micah, but it didn't have the same ring to it.) Quite frankly, I feel like I have been 'falling' most of my life and I appreciate the irony of finally 'landing' on my feet during a Fall. (It's amazing how many good things can come from a Fall! And, yes, that was a shout out to Adam and Eve! And, no, it's not just you, I'm cringing at my own lame-ness!!) So, this is the Fall of Micah.
On a different note. Most of my job now is to conduct phone surveys. (Yes, it's as much fun as it sounds!) Here is what I look like at work with my headset on:
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Here's how I feel about wearing it!
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I'll spare you the background story and get right to the point of my next thought. (My sister's will tell you - I'm a horrible storyteller, so I'm doing you a favor! You're welcome! *SNAP*) This is the Fall of Micah. So you know how some people say's it's "their year?" Great things are about to happen; they can feel it coming. As if a distant train, bearing a cornucopia of blessings, is speeding toward them with nothing but a faint rumbling in the ground to announce it's approach. For some people, the train has more of a timetable and it's not just their year, but their season, for example, "this is going to be the Summer of Carl," or whatever. Well, that's how I feel with Grad School starting this Fall. It's the Fall of Micah. I feel like great things are going to happen. There's an anticipation I can't describe or even attach to any specific future event - I just think life is going to be great! (Someone suggested to me the Autumn of Micah, but it didn't have the same ring to it.) Quite frankly, I feel like I have been 'falling' most of my life and I appreciate the irony of finally 'landing' on my feet during a Fall. (It's amazing how many good things can come from a Fall! And, yes, that was a shout out to Adam and Eve! And, no, it's not just you, I'm cringing at my own lame-ness!!) So, this is the Fall of Micah.
On a different note. Most of my job now is to conduct phone surveys. (Yes, it's as much fun as it sounds!) Here is what I look like at work with my headset on:
Here's how I feel about wearing it!
Monday, July 11, 2011
Just typing my thoughts...
So I bought a new phone recently and I love it! It's a Thunderbolt by HTC; it's a smartphone with the capability to become a hotspot. In other words, I now have access to the internet anywhere I can get a cell phone signal AND I can run the internet off my computer from it! I LOVE it!!! I mean, I HEART it!!! (As a side note, I also love that I can feel like Harry Potter by saying that I have my very own Thunderbolt!! Yeah, I'm a nerd - I totally "own" it!!)
I cancelled my home internet about a year ago to save money and I'm really glad I did. Quite frankly, I can't believe I did without the internet at home for A YEAR!! But I really felt that with starting grad school in the Fall, not to mention my online summer class, that it was becoming more of a need. I did the first half of my summer class without it and it was tough. I had to go to the Library and be there ALL day - it was becoming extremely hard to do. Having the internet has made it significantly easier to participate in an online class - imagine that! It was good timing actually, my online class has gotten much harder where it requires me to do much more research. I thought I would be bored only working 3 days a week, but now that I have so much to do for this class, it's turned out to be a blessing.
Crikey! I just realized that I keep saying "starting school in the Fall," when I just realized - that's next month! Great googly-moogly!! I can't believe how good it feels to say "I'm starting Grad school next month!"
AAAAGGGGHHHHH!!! (kind of freaking out here!)
It almost seems surreal in a way. It was just about a year ago I was contemplating life and my direction when I made a decision to go back to school. Looking back, it's amazing to see how everything has fallen into place. For me it feels like some kind of divine intervention. A part of me wants to believe that all that has happened was somehow "meant to be," but I've learned another lesson. Sometimes, Heavenly Father just wants to bless me and He is capable of making things work out in such a way that it feels like fate or destiny or whatever. But really, it's just love. He loves to bless me when I choose to do good things. I know for a fact that I wouldn't be here without Him. I know that all the good things that have happened to me have been His doing. I also know that all the bad things I've been through have been for my good too. I don't know how to express that idea adequately so I'll save that thought for another day. Suffice it to say: I may have made some choices, but He made it all possible.
I cancelled my home internet about a year ago to save money and I'm really glad I did. Quite frankly, I can't believe I did without the internet at home for A YEAR!! But I really felt that with starting grad school in the Fall, not to mention my online summer class, that it was becoming more of a need. I did the first half of my summer class without it and it was tough. I had to go to the Library and be there ALL day - it was becoming extremely hard to do. Having the internet has made it significantly easier to participate in an online class - imagine that! It was good timing actually, my online class has gotten much harder where it requires me to do much more research. I thought I would be bored only working 3 days a week, but now that I have so much to do for this class, it's turned out to be a blessing.
Crikey! I just realized that I keep saying "starting school in the Fall," when I just realized - that's next month! Great googly-moogly!! I can't believe how good it feels to say "I'm starting Grad school next month!"
AAAAGGGGHHHHH!!! (kind of freaking out here!)
It almost seems surreal in a way. It was just about a year ago I was contemplating life and my direction when I made a decision to go back to school. Looking back, it's amazing to see how everything has fallen into place. For me it feels like some kind of divine intervention. A part of me wants to believe that all that has happened was somehow "meant to be," but I've learned another lesson. Sometimes, Heavenly Father just wants to bless me and He is capable of making things work out in such a way that it feels like fate or destiny or whatever. But really, it's just love. He loves to bless me when I choose to do good things. I know for a fact that I wouldn't be here without Him. I know that all the good things that have happened to me have been His doing. I also know that all the bad things I've been through have been for my good too. I don't know how to express that idea adequately so I'll save that thought for another day. Suffice it to say: I may have made some choices, but He made it all possible.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Homemade Syrup
I miss the Saturday mornings when my dad would make us homemade syrup for our pancakes or french toast*. I remember him getting out the little sauce pot (hardly ever used because my mom normally cooks for an army!) and would put in some water and measure out some sugar. Then he’d separate it and make different flavored syrups, maple, orange, or even just plain, once in a while. I think he may have even put in a little food coloring just to make it interesting.
It seems like such a simple thing now, but I remember it made those mornings feel special – I suppose because it was out of the ordinary. And not only did he not do it often, I never knew of anyone else who could do that at all. Just one more of those surprising things that my dad knew how to do. He seemed so average most of the time and then out of nowhere he’d whip out this special skill he’d been hiding – who knows from where and who knows from how long ago. In fact, in a way, it seemed like these secret things he knew how to do were just a part of him, somehow written into his DNA, patiently waiting for the day they were needed. I bet he had a whole lot of other useful knowledge tucked away in secret corners of his mind, just waiting to be needed for special occasions. He knew how to make syrup. He knew how to make bullets. He could build a camp fire out of almost nothing. He always knew what was wrong with my car. I miss the things he could have taught me, but I’m also grateful for the memories I have of the ordinary days he made special with just a bit of syrup.
*Occasionally we made the "poor man's snow cone," by going outside to make snowballs, then bring them inside and pour on the syrup (we let the syrup cool a little so it didn't melt the snow all at once!).
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| (I snagged this photo off the web w/o permission, i.e. it's not a photo of my own!) |
It seems like such a simple thing now, but I remember it made those mornings feel special – I suppose because it was out of the ordinary. And not only did he not do it often, I never knew of anyone else who could do that at all. Just one more of those surprising things that my dad knew how to do. He seemed so average most of the time and then out of nowhere he’d whip out this special skill he’d been hiding – who knows from where and who knows from how long ago. In fact, in a way, it seemed like these secret things he knew how to do were just a part of him, somehow written into his DNA, patiently waiting for the day they were needed. I bet he had a whole lot of other useful knowledge tucked away in secret corners of his mind, just waiting to be needed for special occasions. He knew how to make syrup. He knew how to make bullets. He could build a camp fire out of almost nothing. He always knew what was wrong with my car. I miss the things he could have taught me, but I’m also grateful for the memories I have of the ordinary days he made special with just a bit of syrup.
*Occasionally we made the "poor man's snow cone," by going outside to make snowballs, then bring them inside and pour on the syrup (we let the syrup cool a little so it didn't melt the snow all at once!).
Sunday, June 12, 2011
I LOVE ridiculous things! (Big, blue, spoon-loving ridiculous things!)
As evidenced by my fascination with this guy...
I loved the cartoon when it was on t.v. Which is why I bought both seasons! I've been re-watching them and they are hilarous!! Truly campy and ridiculous, but just my type of humor. (FYI, a little disappointed in the live action t.v. series [even though I bought that too!], but the cartoon - totally entertaining.) My favorite episode is "The Little Wooden Boy and the Belly of Love." I mean, seriously, the title alone, right!? And how can you not love a cartoon where an evil santa multiplies and the only way to eliminate the extra santa's is by generating static by rubbing them together - priceless!!
Uhhh... or maybe you just had to be there.
I loved the cartoon when it was on t.v. Which is why I bought both seasons! I've been re-watching them and they are hilarous!! Truly campy and ridiculous, but just my type of humor. (FYI, a little disappointed in the live action t.v. series [even though I bought that too!], but the cartoon - totally entertaining.) My favorite episode is "The Little Wooden Boy and the Belly of Love." I mean, seriously, the title alone, right!? And how can you not love a cartoon where an evil santa multiplies and the only way to eliminate the extra santa's is by generating static by rubbing them together - priceless!!
Uhhh... or maybe you just had to be there.
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