Update

October is here and I know the rest of the year is now going to fly by! I'm looking forward to the holidays though. Mostly, I just want to survive my classes. They are hard, but I also love what I'm learning and I love what I'm doing. I know I'm in the right place for me right now and that gives me peace.

I loved GenCon 180* by the way; I don't know if I'll have time to post about some of what I learned, but the whole conference was awesome! I LOVE Saturday morning sessions! I don't know what it is, but I think some of the best talks come out of that session.

One thing I will say, I have a renewed testimony of prayers being answered. I had a couple (and by a couple I mean many) questions I was hoping to have answered and while I can't say that each question was answered as directly as I would like, I know that the answers are there. I decided that I would put a star next to the names of the speakers in my notes that I felt were speaking to my specific questions and I ended up starring over half the talks.

Heavenly Father let me know that the answers are there and, in a weird way, I'm glad the answers aren't as deliniated as I'd hoped; I guess what I'm saying is, I'm grateful that He's making me work for finding those answers. I know He doesn't want to make things hard, but He wants me to appreciate the lessons I have to learn and I always appreciate the things I have to work for. For the moment it was confirmation enough that the answers are there and now I just need to seek them out.

Except, when do I have time to search, ponder, and pray?!?! Ugh! I am buried in school work and I have a major test tomorrow that I know I'm not ready for. I guess I have to remember to take things one day at a time and deal with what I CAN do, rather than worry about what I can't control. That's a hard lesson for me to learn.

One thing that I've come to know is important to finding balance, is boundaries. Have you ever had a relationship that, while not necessarily outright destructive, was maybe just subtly corrosive? I have. It's not easy putting up the boundary that says, "I can't let you hurt me anymore," when the other person is not cognizant of what they're doing. But I had to do that recently and it's strange, because it doesn't necessarily make me happy, BUT, I have to admit that when I did I felt an amazing sense of freedom and a weight being lifted. I felt freer, and that to me is an indication that I did the right thing. I hope things change in the future, but for the moment, I know it was the right thing to do. I just hope the other person realizes that I still love them, but I can't "love" people at the cost of my own well being.

*GenCon 180 is the 180th session of General Conference!